We have talked in the past about some aspects of a relationship that are key. Lately I’ve been feeling ridiculously thankful for the love and support that Sappy has shown me and continues to show me on a daily basis. Through different experiences and decisions, I have come to realize that support is crazy important! We have to be able to trust each other and the choices we make to better our relationship and lives. I’m not here to be his mother and he isn’t here to rule over me and be all powerful. We are equals. We are partners. We love each other and want to lift each other up, not tear the other one down in order to have seniority.
Salty and I have been really trying to build each other up, and I’m here to say that it was a struggle at first because we knew next to nothing about what we liked or wanted from the relationship. I felt like I was going to marry Salty, but I wasn’t sure if she felt the same so I was not about to spend everything that I had on her. I still won’t spend all of my money on her because that’s just plain dumb, but I am now willing to devote all of my time and effort to making her happy. While I did not know how long we would be together, I tried listening to her to understand how to help our relationship grow stronger. Through conversation and observation, we have been able to pick up on the small things that improve our lives and have spent our time giving and receiving gifts, whether in the form of food, a light kiss, a compliment, a love note, or a night out. Through the small things and listening, we have created a strong and lasting relationship with a foundation that is unshakable. We continue to express our devotion, support, and love through different challenges that have to be resolved and choices that have to be made.
About two and a half weeks ago, I went into my bishop’s office to talk about where mine and Sappy’s relationship was going and if we were on the right course. He told me that some things would have to change in order for us to reach our goal of being sealed in the temple. After the meeting, I came and talked with Sappy. I told him one of us would have to go home to California until the wedding and that that was the only way for us to move forward with our sealing on the 30th. At first Sappy listened, then decided it needed to be him because I was in school, I needed to get my dress fitted and all that fun stuff. I agreed that the most logical solution would be for him to go home. He hated the idea; absolutely hated it and I did too. I didn’t want to go the next twenty days without him but I knew it was the right thing to do. I believed that through this, we would learn, grow, and become better versions of who we already were. Sappy put his faith and trust in me and came to his own conclusion that this was something he needed to do.
In return (and just on her own), Salty has supported me in my own decisions and has expressed her love for me at all times. As most of you know, I was dismissed from BYU for academics. I had a job at the MTC at the time, but I lost this when I was dismissed because they require you to be enrolled in BYU if you are to hold a part-time job there. Luckily I had another job lined up and was able to start working again right away, but now some difficulties have come up and I plan on leaving the new job that I have. In all of this, Salty has stayed by my side even though it seems like the job turnover will never stop. Blessings come to those who are willing to make adjustments and move forward, and now I have received a new job offer that I am applying to and I hope to be successful in it. Salty has never told me “Babe, you need to stick with the job you have so that we can be economically stable” or “You are stressing me out with jumping in and out of work.” Instead, she has stood by my side and encouraged me to find something that interests me, to reach a little higher, to walk a little taller. I feel like I can be myself around her, and she helps me to make hard decisions because I know that in all of it, she will be there to support me.
Even as I’m writing or doing my homework or some other task, Sappy will tell me, “You’ve got it babe.” The support that he openly offers means the world to me and helps me to improve in ways I didn’t realize was possible. We are nearing our temple date (only 12 more days!) and the endless love and countless ways that he holds me up has made fearless when it comes to our future. He is so strong both physically and spiritually. Sappy supports me in so many ways I can’t even begin to list them and I can only see it getting better.
I absolutely adore Salty in every way possible, and it’s all because of the things she has done for me and I have done for her. I am grateful for the love she has shown me these last 5 months, and I can not wait for these 12 days to be over with! I want to be there for Salty at all times, and I want to spend all of eternity with her.